Saturday, January 14, 2006

Giving me a break

Well it seems that the blog really hasn't taken off as well as I had thought. Its not that people aren't coming to visit the site, which hasn't happened, but that I haven't been writing in it as much as I would like to. Why? I'm beginning to think the idea is too rigid, that I have some concept that I have to convince myself that is real, which I believe it is, and convince everyone else. But if I do this to the exclusion of being real myself, that is, presenting myself authentically then nothing at all of worth is accomplished. So today I'm starting from a new perspective. I have to do something. In some ways I am desperate. My life maybe falling apart at the seams from appearances. With this I mean financially, career-wise. The fact is I have no job and haven't had one since October. My savings is all used up and I'll have to start tapping into my IRA (a small retirement fund which won't last long either) to pay rent next month, unless something else happens. So, I've had a break from the awful world of work. I don't understand how people do it each day. It seems that most people get up and go to a job that they hate every day with stoic resolve. They do it because they have to, they have to pay the bills. I have the audacity to think that life doesn't have to be that way. That somehow I can be happy. I know that there are jobs that people enjoy and perhaps I've enjoyed at least one or two jobs I can think of to a certain extent. So this is my focus: job, money, success. I can't write a blog about anything else, because this is what my life is focused on right now. This is what I am using the power of vision to create for myself. It is necessary. It is what the world is demanding of me.

I need a break. I've been lucky to take a break from the tedium of the world. Now I need a financial break. I want the financial abundance to continue living life happily. All power of visualization is being directed to that purpose. I remain in gratitude for all things that I do have, and all things to come.

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