Are we coming from ego or do we have awareness of consciousness? How much of our time is spent in ego, blaming others and external circumstances? How much do we take 100% responsibility for our experience and choose to come from a place of enlightened awareness? These question have been central to my thoughts lately. I've literally been saturating myself with uplifting material to affect a change. It's one of those times that I am tired of suffering. And, I think I've had a breakthrough.
The last full moon brought intensified emotions to the surface of my mind and heart. I was intensely angry. Situations at work were just getting out of hand, I thought. But in reality, how much was I really creating the situation? How much was I really going into an angry state? I believe I was creating bad situations for myself due to my own low self-esteem and negative beliefs about myself. I fought back. I got angry. That seemed to work, but it was not the ultimate answer. Ultimately we need to bring ourselves back to a place of inner peace. Accordingly, the world will begin to reflect that inner peace back to us. This is tough to do. It takes effort and awareness of our thoughts and emotions. It takes believing that we are not just victims of our lives and circumstances. It may take a while for our circumstances to change - believe me I am one of the stubbornest people to say this - but the key to change is our own thoughts. We must work to change our own thoughts, feelings and emotions. We must take a step back out of our small reactive ego minds and see and feel from a more conscious perspective. This is a quieter place, more still. This is the place where creative source begins.
When there is enough suffering and enough willingness to change then the effort can be made to come to this realization. For me, I've been saturating myself with information and programming myself to a higher vibration. I've been starting my day watching You Can Heal Your Life, a DVD about Louise Hay and her life. I've been listening to inspiring music. I've been listening to talks on CD by Abraham-Hicks. I've noticed that when I absent-mindedly just give into the TV, then my state of mental well-being begins to rapidly decline. As such, I become more susceptible to anger, depression and generally negative emotions. An effort needs to be made, I've discovered. I have to make a great effort each day, each moment to stay in a higher vibration. I have to say positive affirmation in the car on my way to work. I have to declare my workspace a sacred place. In effect, it is a constant effort at good mental hygiene. It is a shift in greater awareness. I'm working more with my subconscious mind. It is a reconnection with inner truth and source energy.
Oprah is doing a series on the internet that is very much in line with what I am talking about. This afternoon I listened to an online discussions with Eckhart Tolle and Oprah. You too can see this discussion online at this link. Tolle presents himself wonderfully as a very aware and wise man. He speaks in the first 90 minute session of the importance of finding that still quiet place of consciousness within. It is an important time in our history, a period of crisis Tolle says. As such it is also a time of opportunity and growth as our society has an opportunity to awaken to a greater extent than ever before. If this compels you, it certainly is worth checking out.